I can’t believe I’m 17 weeks already, only three more weeks until that half way mark and our 20 week scan. We’ve made the decision this week that we won’t be finding out babies gender. I think it’ll be nice to have a little surprise at the end of the pregnancy. I have an inkling that I think I know what the gender is (I was correct with Rowan) as I’ve been having some really vivid dreams about it, so we’ll find out in around 23 weeks if I’m right!
Yesterday I had my appointment with the antenatal consultant and it didn’t go quite to plan, I left feeling overwhelmed, confused, anxious and very upset (once we got into the car). Basically we discussed planning for a VBAC if I go into spontaneous labour before 40 weeks and 10 days. They’d then book me in for a c-section at the 40 weeks + 10 days mark. I was two weeks overdue with Rowan and it was hard work, given the strain it put on my heart I don’t think I could go through that again.
I’ve had more positive discussions about it with my midwife who said I’d probably be booked in for an elective c-section at 39 weeks due to my past heart troubles and to help my anxiety levels. This would also ensure a date booked in so we can arrange childcare for Rowan, as we don’t have anyone close by to leave him with if I went into labour in the middle of the night. This is what I want to happen, I’m happy to go right up to my due date and have an elective c-section a day before or after my due date.
With regards to my heart the antenatal consultant basically said it’s not under their area, and no plans are in place if my heart goes back into its weird rhythm. Following my operations the risk of something happening is very low but I’m incredibly scared about it and my concerns were not addressed at this appointment when I expected they would be. Thankfully I have contact details for the cardiac nurse, she’s brilliant and is always there to help answer my concerns and to check things with my cardiologist. I’ve outlined what happened yesterday and I’m hoping she can give me some reassurance and the two teams can have a conversation about it, we shall see!
I am back to see the consultant at 36 weeks for a progress report and I will be absolutely putting my foot down and stating that I want the elective c-section on or a few days either side of the due date or at the 39 weeks mark. This isn’t a decision I’ve taken lightly, we discussed all the risks and implications of another c-section but I’m absolutely terrified of trying to give birth naturally as it all went wrong with Rowan and was so stressful by the latest stages. In the meantime I’m so anxious and worried about the appointment yesterday I’m going to give my midwife a call to see what she thinks we should do and who I need to speak with.
On a lighter note I did get to hear babies heartbeat which was absolutely brilliant. Baby has shifted position too as it was hidden away really low down last week and the heartbeat this time was just below my belly button. I’m also starting to feel a bit more movement, feels like a lot of wriggling is going on, particularly at 4am! I’ve not felt many punches or kicks yet and I can’t wait to start feeling the stronger movements, along with some hiccups too!
Baby is now the size of a pear (around 4.94 oz and 13 cm long), and apart from the anxiety and another headache yesterday (I think that was brought on by the stress of the appointment) I’m feeling pretty good. No cravings as yet but I didn’t get many with Rowan apart from Innocent Tropical Juice, which I drank by the bucket load quite late on in the pregnancy.
Well that was a long update and I hope I’ve not bored you too much. Let’s see what next week brings.